A Writer's Journey

my weight loss ticker

2009-02-24T06:03:00.000+04:00

www.my-calorie-counter.com The webs free Calorie Chart

Me the Pessimist

2009-02-07T12:41:00.003+04:00

I must say I have a lot of negative energy in me. I am a hard core pessimist. I usually decide that things will just not go my way and give up at the very beginning. This in particular has been detrimental to my writing career. I have loads of ideas but have been skeptical as regards to getting them on paper and even if I have managed to bring my ideas to life, I start doubting if any magazine would be interested. I have been trying hard to come out of my negative skin and have succeeded a few times and those were the times my articles got printed. Not many, I must say.

I guess I lack the confidence and the passion. I need to completely get over my negativity because that’s the only thing that’s stopping me from becoming an accomplished writer. I’ve read so many books on overcoming this negative element but then these self help books have not been of much help. I tend to sleep midway into the book. I have friends and family supporting me but my cynical attitude has been my greatest disadvantage. So let me see, I try to get at least 5 articles in print this year. I give myself a goal and I just might overcome my disability.

But, what if I don’t? Oh! Boy, here I go again.

Desire for a Home

2009-02-06T10:59:00.000+04:00

As kids my brother and I loved to play house. We used our precious Lego collection to create the outline of our dream house complete with bedrooms, kitchen, bathrooms, living rooms, and even a secret hideout. Those were childish ambitions for a house equipped with the latest technologies, which were never heard of then. As I entered my preteens, my desire grew with me, so did the number of bedrooms, a huge swimming pool, a spacious lawn, a Jacuzzi etc…. The house that I dreamt of was always enormous. Finally, when my parents shifted to a bigger house I was excited. I finally had a bedroom of my own with an attached bathroom and a balcony, huge windows and a built in wardrobe. I was ecstatic. But, I still dreamt of a house with bedrooms that have walk in wardrobes, huge chandeliers, a party hall with the latest music system and even a helipad. Now, those were adolescent dreams. When, I ventured into the world as an adult, I realized that having a roof over your head was something to be cherished. The house no matter how small can always bring comfort. Today, I have no desire for that massive house equipped with the latest technologies and facilities. All I want is a house that I can call my home. No matter how small, a place where my children can come home to for their father’s guidance and their mother’s cooking. A home of my own.

Back after a Loooooooooooooong break

2009-02-03T20:04:00.001+04:00

I was on a break. Had loads of things on hand. I've turned into a complete workaholic. My day starts at 4:30 am and ends at 12:00 am, with two hours sleep during the afternoon. I do need my afternoon siesta or I would go completely mad.

A few years back when my first born was just 6 months old I felt I had so much time but nothing worthwhile to do and no one to talk to. I was new to Abu Dhabi though I'd spent my entire life in Dubai, I was lonely. All my friends in Dubai seemed busy and I would wonder what to do with my time. That really got me depressed. Now, I have no time to think. Writing, crochet and knitting (I want to make some stuff for the upcoming woman's day exhibition here)and then there are the kids. Anyway I've started working on a few ideas. I would love to blog for money but frankly I have no idea how it works. Got to do my homework on that.

Just visited Chryselle's blog and I was surprised and pleased to find my name among the list of writers she likes. So sweet. I must say Chryselle you are a very kind person. I would love to meet you some day.

2008-03-03T21:32:00.001+04:00

I have been writing and submitting like crazy. My in-laws are coming next week and that means no time for any writing. They'll most probably be taking up my entire time for may be 2 months. I was looking forward to spending time by myself during the months of April and May, when my younger one starts school. But, now it looks like I'll have to give up on a lot of things. And also, no more driving training, can't leave my old in-laws alone at home.

The Bollywood filmfare awards are on today and I would so like to watch it but my TV is down. I want to watch Shahrukh Khan doing the silly things that India loves.

I want to write a unique piece for Father's Day, but my mind just seems to drift to gifts and spending time with Daddy dear. What can I write that hasn't already been written? As a child me and my father never really bonded together, though I was in awe with him. To me he was unreachable, untouchable. But, as I turned into a teenager, my father seemed to be proud of my achievements and looks. For him I turned into an asset. We've had a lot of differences lately. But, then I feel as we grow older we realize that our parents were infact human, and they too made a lot of mistakes. But, I still love my dad very much and huring him in anyway is the last thing I would do.

Well, I would need all the luck I need during my in-laws visit. Hope to see them leave happily without any regrets from either their side or my side.

Global Thinking

2008-02-07T05:47:00.000+04:00

It is so cold here. I don't feel like getting out of bed. I get up at 5:00 everyday, can you imagine? But, I believe that what you can achieve early in the morning you cannot achieve that later in the day. I start my day with a hot cup of coffee and try to write something. I have jotted down a few good ideas. The problem is getting started with those ideas.

Tomorrow I'll be having the kids and hubby darling at home. That means no access of the computer. On saturday a few friends have planned a refreshing ladies day trip to the Global Village. An evening of shopping and fun.Hubby will be babysitting the younger one.

I think today I'm gonna spend my time reading. Had a freind over for dineer yesterday night so I'm left with dinner left overs to cover todays lunch. Very convenient.

Yawn! Wish I could go back to bed.

On my way

2008-02-06T08:40:00.000+04:00

Things seem to be going good. I might be slow but I'm trying to achieve my goals. Last half of the year, I lost weight, got two articles accepted. This year one of them got published and the other will be published in june. I feel more confident with my driving after I changed from manual to automatic. Will soon give a road test. My goal is to get my license in march and get a car for my birthday.

My mind is loaded with ideas for writing and that really makes me feel good.

If anyone is interested they can check out my latest article printed in Jen Magazine.It is about things to do and not to do on valentine's day for singles.

http://www.jenmagazine.com/lds-singles/

Do pass some encouraging comments.

I am a winner

2007-11-07T12:52:00.000+04:00

Wow! I don't believe it. I'm finally going to get published. My article "Damage Control for mothers" has finally been accepted by, "Parenting Guide" a New York based magazine. The aticle will be out on June 2008. Right now I'm not really bothered about being payed, but hey it would be great if I was.

I'm like on top of the world now and finally, I have realized that I do have potential. That does feel great.

Hope I continue getting published.

I'm Back

2007-10-03T06:42:00.000+04:00

Vacation and fasting has given me a writers block. I've been putting off writing for quite some time now. Anyway, my visit to India was nothing to rave about but I sure seem to have returned with a new figure and new set of mind. Concerning my figure I've lost several inches from the waist and my scale shows me 2 kgs less. I've reached my ideal weight and now my only concern is to keep it that way. I seem to have gained considerable control over my anger.I'm falling in love with myself.

Ramadan this year was fine. Ofcourse, by the end of the day I would be dead tired. Iftar parties are an elaborate affair here in UAE, with people showing off their wealth by giving huge iftar banquets at posh restaurants. The real meaning of Ramadan seems to have changed. The other day, I read about an article about how the arabs in the past used to observe ramadan. Those seem to be enchanting times when this holy month was all about love and sharing.

Ramadan during my childhood days was exciting too. I used to spend my evenings praying with my best friend at the local mosque. After prayers we would play and chat. Every evening I would eagerly wait for my mother's delicious snacks. Those were magical moments of my life.

Eid was fine. I was so busy I never felt the thrill of this special day. We had some special guests and so had a lot to prepare. The next day I went to visit my parents in Dubai. I've been getting a lot of compliments recently and I must say, I find it a little embarrassing. Well! I guess I just can't handle compliments.

Anyway, back to routine and writing. Here I am today knocking my brains trying to write something interesting. My assignment is pending too and I've gotta get that driving license before the next eid which is in two months time.

Memories

2007-07-24T09:02:00.000+04:00

I was just thinking how long it has been since I have smiled. Not that I don't smile at all. Oh! yes, I always smile at the neighbour, the kids; when they get up in the morning, my husband; when he leaves for office but those are not what I call genuine or from the heart. I wish I could smile naturally without having to force myself to do it.

When I was in school my friends would always make me smile. We used to all be upto naughty tricks. Like the time we had a wrestling match in the corridor or the time my friend jumped out of the class window and right in front of the supervisor. Every celebration was an excuse to hang out at 'Pizza Hut'. Once there we enjoyed harrassing the waiters or pulling tissue rolls and tying it to the door(don't ask me why we did that). We even used to litterally poison each others drinks with ketchup, salt, pepper, mayo and whatever we could lay our hands on. One friend of mine even spitted in another's pepsi. I know that was gross, but we were young and everything was cool.

During the schools days friends were the only family I recognized. I loved going to school and hated coming home. Oh! I had no problems at home but I didn't really enjoy at home. Even at home we would spend hours over the phone until our ears turned red and hot. We even did most of our homework over the phone. Those days were magical.

My best friends then were Fatima, Alka and Susan. Fatima was and still is my strong support. She is my childhood friend and the first friend I have. She has been with me throughout my life. We've been friends for almost 25 yrs now. She understands me in and out. She knows me better than my parents or my husband. She's gone through a lot of sufferings and has lost two babies. But, I admire her strength. Inspite of her problems she is ever ready to help me with my silly woes.

Alka was a very sweet girl. She was forever ready to have fun. We became friends in 7th grade. Before that I never really liked her. But, afterwards I got hooked to her fun loving nature. We both enjoyed dancing and singing. Today, though she is too busy with work and frankly she seems like a changed person. I practically have no contact with her though we live only a two hours apart. But then I guess life goes on and frankly I have no regrets. She was such a lovely person and she instilled in me confidence to do the things that i liked. Though we both have gone our different ways I still remember her fondly as the sweetest friend I ever had.

Susan was a tomboy. A good friend but very moody. I could never understand her but I loved her carefree nature. I remember when we had a singing competition in school and she was supposed to sing in her coarse, harsh voice. Everyone started to laugh and that made her angry. She used abusive langusge and went away crying. We felt bad for her inspite of her angry words. After everyone had finished singing we called her back and when she started singing we encouraged her even though our ears were paining. But, what struck me was her confidence. She had a very bad voice yet she came upto sing. I loved her 'I care a damn' attitude. She was ever ready to sacrifice herself for her friends but after I went to India, I don't know when we drifted apart. Today, both Alka and Susan seem to have forgotten me. But, that doesn't hurt me though. I guess we all have to get on with our lives nad only the truest of all freinds will stay with you throughout your life.

Busy Bee

2007-07-23T17:31:00.000+04:00

Wow! Have been so busy shopping and getting organized, I'd almost forgotten about this blog. My writing right now has taken a back seat while I'm busy getting ready for a "Monsoon In India". Wowee! that sounds like a wonderful title. Got to keep it in mind. Will make a wonderful travel article.

My cousin expired two days ago. She was suffering from cancer. Was hoping to meet her in India but she left without a goodbye. She was far elder to me and I remember the way she would feed me and put me to sleep when I was a little girl. I feel particularly sad for her teenage children, especially her girl. A mother can be so very important. Every step that a girl takes she looks back at her mother for approval and encouragement.

Ta Da

2007-07-20T07:52:00.000+04:00

Here I am, finally with my own blog. I have been meaning to get on with this for may be over a year now. I am slowly and steadily getting on to be a true writer. Ok! I know I've just got one article published in the local newspaper but at least, that makes me finally, feel like a writer. I was having my doubts about my talent. I've sent in a few queries and am awaiting replies.

Next week will see me in India soaking in the rains. I love the rains but am not very keen in visiting the place. I love India, but I hate the restricitions that I have to follow at my in-laws place (that is where I'll be staying). I hate the lizards and I hate the old house. It gives me the creeps. Last year when I was down there, the lizards had kept me awake almost every night. I used to sleep inside a mosquito net and these creepy crawlies would climb over the net. My hair stands on ends just remembering that dreadful night.

Hopefully, I won't have to spend much time at my in-laws, since I'll be attending my cousin's wedding. So, I can spend most of my days with my mother. It's not fair that my vacations have to be a nightmare. I have been pestering my husband to take me to Rajasthan, but he is thinking of Hyderabad. Lets see if we really would be going anywhere. I'm eager to write a travel article but the only travel that I usually do is the Journey from the bedroom to the kitchen.

Today, I'm going to relax. No hubby at home and I'll give the kids a free hand. Let them enjoy and relax too.